Growing up, I had a timetable set for my life. At 17, I would graduate from high school (summer birthday). At 21, I would graduate from college. And by the time I was 25, I would be happily married to a supermodel. Add some kids in before I turned 30, and things were looking up for my imaginary life...
In my actual life, which I am actually living, I graduated on time from high school and college, but then took my fallback job - a manager at Walgreens, and not a PR guy for the XFL (dream job!). As I was mildly ashamed of my profession, I didn't actively seek out relationships, and so I certainly wasn't married by the time I was 25. And, well, the less said about the production of children the better. So I occasionally got bummed out about this in the past.
A few weeks ago, a "wise" friend told me about his agreement with a mutual friend, that neither of them would be normal guys living normal lives. A very cute girl I know said that she wasn't the type of girl who went to school to get her MRS degree (a joke that took me a surprisingly long time to understand). And then I realized - was that my highest aspiration growing up? To be a normal guy? To get married right out of college and settle down?
I'm not going to criticize anyone's life choices, especially because everyone is different, and has different goals and wants and needs and favorite pizza toppings...but I can say (with the benefit of hindsight) that the route my imaginary life would have taken is kind of boring compared to the route my actual life has taken. In my imaginary life, I wouldn't have moved to Arkansas or Massachusetts, and I certainly would have had less time for improv and making hilarious videos. And I LOVE those parts of my life! I would have been working at Walgreens, supporting a growing brood and talking with neighbors about the secrets of lawn care. I've been upset about my life not taking the path that I assumed was "normal" without realizing that I'm not a normal person! [Note: I would not say "abnormal." Let's go with "atypical."]
So that's that. I am aware that I tend to vacillate between being a "normal guy" and being the guy I am, but hopefully this revelation will lead to less discontent with my life, and exponentially more awesomeness. Again, I am not trying to judge anyone who did get married right out of high school or college, although it may seem that way with my "boring" comment up there. It's just that I'm a atypical guy, and those choices don't really fit with the person I am...
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2 comments:
Good for you, Brad! And although it appears that I did go to college to receive my MRS degree, if I had been "normal", I'd still be living in the Chicago area, and never have moved to TN nor NH. A side note: it's weird that AR borders TN, and MA borders NH.
Nice post Brad! I often reflect on these things as well. If I would have had the life that I imagined when I was much younger, I would have missed out on going back to school to become a pastry chef and missed moving to Maryland, Chicago, Las Vegas. I would have missed on meeting a slew of people that have helped inspire me. I would have missed out on opportunities and experiences that have shaped me both professionally and personally. While my life isn't the one I envisioned, I couldn't be happier. I think for some of us; the marriage, the kids, and the perfect lawn will come eventually, just not when we expect it to.
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